Skip to main content

Duck...Duck...(Oh Shoot!)

I don't often consider my life buzzworthy for personal stories, but I must make an exception for this one. I have worked lawn maintenance for 6 summers now, but no experience quite compares to this one.

My crew was at the mall for the day to mow, trim, blow, pull weeds, and pick up 9 billion cigarette butts (which reproduce faster than an asexual insect). I was in the middle of a juniper bed, doing my best to weed-out wiregrass and the like. The juniper was almost knee-high. It was such a mundane activity that i didn't give it any second thought. Generally speaking, I am pretty aware of my surroundings. This time would prove to be an exception however. I was walking in the middle of the bed making my way to the far side, when as I stepped and reached for a weed, a UFO (denotatively, an "unidentified flying object") came from the juniper. A frighented moan ensued. (I'm not exactly sure how to describe the noise which proceeded from my mouth. I'm glad it was a sound and not a word...)

This "thing", coming from my feet, swiftly made its way towards my face, giving me no time to respond. As it flew up, it "billed" my arm, almost breaking the skin. As you may have figured out by now, it was a bird. Its size would have warranted both my arms to carry it. (about 7 pounds) As I gathered myself, I eyed the bird until it was out of striking range. As I looked down to where I had stepped, I noticed a nest with 4 whole eggs and 2 cracked ones. For you einsteins out there, yes! I stepped on two of the eggs. As the bird made its way across the parking lot, I realized it was a duck or goose of some sort. I was glad the goose either didn't have teeth or didn't decide to use them. It was quite adventurous to say the least. I will definitely think twice before jumping in a juniper again! Also, playing Duck, Duck, Goose now has more meaning than ever!

Popular posts from this blog

SportsDesk - 06.25.09

It's official. Shaq is a Cleveland Cavalier. Let the Cleveland nickname offerings begin! Here are some thoughts to consider with this move: The NBA East has officially become as interesting and exciting as the West. The Magic, Cavs, Celtics, Heat and Sixers are as fun to watch as the Lakers, Nuggets, Blazers, Mavs, and Hornets. This trade is the last straw for Cleveland to land LeBron in Summer 2010. If the Cavs don't win the title, LBJ will become a NY Knick next Summer. It's a done deal. The Shaq acquisition doesn't solve any long-term problems for Cleveland. He'll be there one year. Shaq doesn't have 3 years of productivity left. If he wins a title next year, he should retire a champion. I don't see Cleveland giving him a 2-year contract at the end of next season. If LBJ and Shaq "leave" Cleveland next summer, which big free agent star comes to Cleveland in the wake of LBJ? I don't see Wade doing it. Bosh doesn't fit the mold. If Clevel...

No Zion, No Problem? Not So Fast.

Everyone in the media has wanted their piece of the pie with Zion this year. Each highlight reel dunk and spectacular block has only increased the media fervor and number of followers. As Duke looks to face Syracuse, and presumably Virginia Tech as well, without Zion, let's consider what Duke looks like without Zion, and what it must do against Syracuse to leave the Carrier Dome with a W. DUKE WITHOUT ZION Duke without Zion is not a cart without a horse. But it might be a sports car without its turbo. Or maybe a chef without her secret sauce. Here are the main points to consider: MAIN POINTS - A Five Spot 1. Without Zion, Duke can’t play “position-less basketball” since all bench players have limitations. Not only is Zion our best two-way player (offense and defense), but he also allows the greatest roster flexibility in terms of building around him. He wreaks havoc wherever he is on the floor. We don't have another player like that, certainly not from the bench...

Favre Talking Points

I was a closet Green Bay fan in high school, mainly because of some big-time Packer fans in my church. Granted, it was easy to pull for them, since they weren't rivals with America's Team -- that's right! What intrigues me the most is that three teams took different approaches to Brett Favre, and I believe they would've have been mistaken to respond differently. Packers were criticized (as was Favre) for not letting Favre come back. I'm sure there are still some detractors that would say Favre would've won more games than Rodgers (6). What's interesting is that Aaron Rodgers QB stats (other than wins) were better than Favre's. The point is that, the Packers weren't going to win the NFC last season, with or without #4. They could be a Super Bowl team in 2-3 years. The Packers made a great move by parting with Favre. It couldn't have happened better for them. Jets are a bit more troublesome to parse apart. The only thing that makes them look foolis...